<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Banana Boat by beautiful_delirium</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29644431">Banana Boat</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/beautiful_delirium/pseuds/beautiful_delirium'>beautiful_delirium</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fruit, Fruit Fight, I am Wanda and I make my own canon, Johnny is a little shit, Post-Canon, This is the product of Cas and I being total dumbasses on discord, Violence, actual violence towards the end not just fruit massacre, and I have no regrets, and V loves him, and it's plain to see, i have no clue how to tag this, these two are idiots, they share one braincell</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 20:41:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,079</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29644431</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/beautiful_delirium/pseuds/beautiful_delirium</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Johnny and V have to resort to a fruit fight during a gig.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Johnny Silverhand/Female V, Johnny Silverhand/V</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Banana Boat</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p><a href="https://silverhand-hoe.tumblr.com/">Cas</a> and I went from talking about department stores and what to find in them to rambling about Johnny and Viola getting into a fruit fight during a gig and this is what came out. </p><p>I couldn't stop laughing as we talked and I couldn't stop laughing as I wrote, so hopefully this will make some of you smile too.</p><p>I have no regrets.</p><p>As always, this is based on my V OC.</p><p>Title is after Banana Boat (Day-O) by Harry Belafonte because I was listening to it on repeat thanks to that one Beetlejuice scene.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>V couldn’t believe her own eyes.</p><p>Out of all outcomes this fucked up gig could have had, a food fight wasn’t in the top five things she would have imagined. It wasn’t even on the top fifteen.</p><p>But it was very like her and Johnny to run out of ammo in a fucking fruit market and their enemies to encounter the same issue, and instead of charging at them with blades, the idiot goons were throwing fruit at them. </p><p>Johnny saw this as a once in a lifetime opportunity and didn’t miss a beat in retaliating with apples from the stall the two of them were hidden behind, and because she loved him, she was playing along.</p><p>She would be lying if she said she wasn’t having a little fun herself. </p><p>When another tomato flew in their direction, Johnny pushed her out of the way but wasn’t quick enough to stop the red sphere from clashing onto his face. It tinted his skin a pinkish colour. </p><p>He blinked heavily, V laugh harder and the next thing she knew he was throwing an entire box of strawberries at her. Their enemies continued to shoot red fruit towards their direction nonstop.</p><p>‘Don’t throw stuff at me, throw it at them!’, she exclaimed, making failed attempts at dodging the incoming berries. </p><p>‘I don’t think I will’.</p><p>V reached for two apples, threw one at Johnny and the other one flew towards one of the gangsters, hitting one of them square in the face. </p><p>They continued on this ridiculously childish game for a good half an hour or so. At some point. Johnny found a box of oranges and was fiercely launching them like fucking baseballs of death, one after the other, while she was furiously dedicated to going through a whole cart of lemons. Their fierce adversaries had recurred to the exotic guns and were shooting dragon fruit and a green rectangle full of spikes she couldn’t even name at them.</p><p>Both she and Johnny were a mess. They kept slipping on the chaos on the floor, their clothes and skin were stained pink, yellow and red and they were sticky in ways that weren’t good.</p><p>She had enough.</p><p>‘Alright, I’m done with this shit. Let’s go get them’.</p><p>‘Why? Not having fun?’.</p><p>Johnny quirked a teasing brow at her. A challenge, she read, like he was daring her to back down now.</p><p>‘Oh, don’t look at me like that. If we get closer to them you’ll be able to use the mangos.’</p><p>His brows and mouth climbed up in approval.</p><p>‘Good point. But we need a plan’, spoke Johnny without a hint of humour, eyes gleaming with determination, treating this food fight like it was a life or death situation.</p><p>She nodded, peeking her head to the side and analysing their surroundings. The fruit stall their adversaries had taken refuge behind was a regular table packed with shelves, hidden beneath a cloth. She could crawl under it easily.</p><p>‘You go first and reach the bananas on the left. Then I’ll go to the mangos on the right and distract them-’</p><p>‘So I can crawl beneath that table and stab them’, completed V. </p><p>Her silver eyes met his brown ones with identical malice.</p><p>‘Cause you’re tiny.’</p><p>V shot him a halfhearted glare and elbowed him on the ribs, drawing a chuckle from his lips.</p><p>She lifted Kiyohime from her back and gave it to him to pass the strap over his shoulders, which he did, tossing the katana onto his back.  </p><p>‘Wish me luck’, muttered the merc, leaning to press a kiss to his mouth and pulling away before he could grab her.</p><p>V’s legs were quick in making a diagonal run for the banana stall, body low and head tucked. When Johnny shouted incoming, she barely had time to escape the watermelon that was chucked in her direction. It exploded on the floor, sending sticky, juicy bits all over her clothes and body. </p><p>She practically threw herself behind the stall when another watermelon was tossed.</p><p>Johnny, on the other hand, was sparing no energy when it came to distracting their enemies. He was dedicated to the task. Even went as far as popping his shades back on.</p><p>His legs rose lazily from behind the mountain of apples, silver hand reaching for Kiyohime in a slow motion. She watched, bemusedly, as he made a show of cutting in half the fruit the two idiots threw in his direction, audibly humming lyrics to a song. </p><p>She dropped onto her knees, carefully crawling her way to the table and trying her best not to spare a single glance at Johnny. If she did, she’d start laughing like there was no tomorrow and would reveal her position. </p><p>It was absolutely ridiculous. Viola Viglianco, renowned merc and assassin crawling on a market floor drenched in fruit parts and juice, while Johnny Silverhand, the guy people would call a terrorist was sauntering over and chopping tomatoes like it was a fucking chef competition. If Panam or Kerry saw this they’d never let them live it down.</p><p>When a mutated purple jackfruit flew over Johnny’s ducked head, she knew it was time to stop stalling. </p><p>V quickly made her way under the table, ignoring the pieces of food that clung to her skin with each drag of her body against the floor. No time was spared in drawing out her mantis blades, and she rapidly stuck her head out of the cloth that covered the table and stabbed one of the bastards in the foot. He screamed and dropped the jackfruit he was holding onto his good foot. Curses flew from his lips, but that was all he had time to do because she was already jumping up and stabbing him through his throat from the back.</p><p>This gave Johnny the perfect window to cut the other idiot’s head clean off.</p><p>An exasperated huff left V, her silver eyes rolled and she sighed.</p><p>
  <em>‘Finalmente! Non potevo più prendere questa disgrazia’.</em>
</p><p>Johnny chuckled, amused.</p><p>‘I don’t think we’re quite done yet, sweetheart’.</p><p>V’s shoulders dropped in defeat. Red sirens went up on her head like they always did whenever Johnny was up to something, and she lifted her head to face him. Much to her dismay, there was a tomato in his hand, bobbing up and down as he tossed it in the air.</p><p>
  <em>Oh no.</em>
</p><p>‘Robert, don’t you fucking dare-’.</p><p>The fruit hit her square in the face.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><em>'Finalmente! Non potevo più prendere questa disgrazia'</em> roughly translates to 'Finally! I couldn't stand this shit anymore' from Italian.</p><p>Find me on <a href="https://beautiful-delirium.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>